let's talk screentime

May 10, 2019

As a parent, it seems there will always be subjects of controversy. Or maybe this is just a human issue? Either way, from the absolute get-go, when choosing to either breastfeed or bottle feed, it seems that mothers in particular get a tremendous amount of flack for the choices we make (or do not make). 

It's difficult to hold strong and fast to those choices, especially in light of the digital age, with opinions and ideas flying fast this way and that--some people being incredibly vocal and unforgiving when they respond to your choice.

Sometimes it seems it would be easier to quietly make the choices--wincingly--then curl up in a hole hoping no one notices or gives their (unsolicited) two cents.

I find this all very silly. I shouldn't be ashamed of the choices I make for my children. The choices that I believe are best for them. Are the choices I make for my family and my kids a commentary on another's way of parenting? Absolutely not. What works for some may not work for all.

All that being said, let's talk screentime.

First of all, we do not own a television...by choice (gasp)! We sold ours Spring of 2017 just before Amelia was born and have never looked back. We have just my laptop and we love it.

Our rules with "TV" time are as follows:

Friday night is movie night! Occasionally we will do a movie or show Saturday as well. Otherwise no shows or movies during the week. 

One exception to this is education. I am teaching the girls French (and simultaneously trying to learn along with them) and we utilize programs such as Little Pim to practice once or twice a week. Another exception is Cosmic Kids Yoga which we try to use practice once a week, as well. The last exception to this rule is sick days. I try my best to focus on art and reading when we are stuck inside and not feeling so well, but after I have exhausted those options or if I am just not feeling hot, yes of course we will throw on a calm show.

If we are going to utilize shows on sick days or on the weekend, they must be calming. The whole premise behind screen time for us is almost a substitute for rest. So, for us this means no over-stimulation, fast movements, violence, sass, bad behavior or trivial content. There must always be purpose behind the shows or movies that we watch in our home. 

The reasons for these rules? Keeping the screen time a rare event and something to look forward to is more special and intentional as opposed to something to be lost in daily. It breeds creativity and rhythm without our activities and home.

The reason for no TV? We want people to be the focus of our home. We want community and conversation to be the focus of our living space. When people come in rather than a television being present it is a place to foster relationships without distraction or temptation. 

What about tablets or games on the screen? As of now, in our house, the age of 4 and 2 is absolutely too young to be able to control themselves with handheld technology, even with us monitoring. However, I am well aware and completely agree that technology is going to be a part of their future and that being said we will slowly and thoughtfully have to introduce to them in increments. 

Over and over I have been asked (and/or scolded) if I am worried that I am being too strict. In all seriousness I am more worried about preserving their creativity and childhood and love of outdoors rather than them being fussy, addicted, lazy and mindless.

Most importantly, with any path you choose with children and technology, is this: mindfulness. Teaching your children to be aware of how shows and movies and screen time makes them feel. How it makes them feel when time is up, or when you take the device (whatever it may be) away. For them to grasp how it is affecting them at a young age, I believe, is what will be the ultimate difference between future mindless consumers or masters of intentional living.

being and longing

Dec 17, 2018

the word 'belonging' holds together the two fundamental aspects of life: 

Being and Longing; the longing of our Being and the being of our Longing...

-john o'donohue

belonging...embracing... sternum-wide-open-wrapping ribs-hearts-touching-we are one, embrace.

we sit there longing to be. just ourselves. we sit there, being, hoping someone else is longing for us. it's the most treasured feeling. the  most sought after, the one people wait years for, cry tears for, pray their hearts out for. 

lavender lately

Sep 11, 2018

i mull over a multitude of emotions, while driving under a blanket of stars at 3:45 am toward a  memorial service in oregon. there's a lump in my throat and tears well up in my eyes as the sun rises, a foray of pink and golden orange fire filling the otherwise clear sky. new mercies.

hesitation, shame, guilt, confusion, grief, devastation jumble around my being.

today's treasures

Mar 21, 2018

a few simple things that brightened my day, and then some...

1. a nature bundle
{and the little girl who handed it to me, on our adventure walk}


Mar 19, 2018

alright. so this time i won't be too hard on myself should i not make it the full year. because, well, as we know--life happens and it's been a bit since i last did this...and really this is much more for my own memories than anything else. thus, without further ado...

© the landrus diaries. Design by FCD.